I
have to tell you that some things have happened here that have made
me laugh out loud.
I’ve
been here so long that when I first got here we weren't allowed TVs.
The Warden at my first prison made a statement to the press that we
were here to be fed, clothed, and killed. As long as he was alive we
would never get TVs or anything else for us. Sadly he passed away the
following year. The new warden allowed us to get televisions from
home. My very first TV was a black and white 13 inch old channel
clicker. My first music box was an 8-Track Tape Player...Remember
those?
But
what was so funny was my first interaction with a microwave in 2003.
At the time, I was on death row but the prison had created an honor
pod on death row where you got little extras for not getting in
trouble. One of the extras was a microwave. I spent three years
without any trouble just to get over to the honor pod and to that
microwave. I love blueberry donuts, and it had been years since I’d
had a blueberry donut warmed up.
One of the first things I wanted was a warm blueberry donut, so I got
my donut, put it in the microwave and waited, and waited—and
waited.
Finally
one of the guys walked up and asked me “Why
are you standing at the microwave so long?”
“I’m
waiting for my donut to warm,”
I
told him.
“Mr.Tyler,”
he
said, gently, “you
have to turn the microwave on first.”
I
laugh now every time I tell that story. I had been in prison so long
I didn't know how to use a microwave.
I didn't get to eat that donut because I turned the microwave on for
six minutes! At four minutes
I
watched my donut burn and dissolve. I melted it. I laugh out loud
every time I think about that story!
